Wrote this yesterday
And today I don't know what to write. I'm sitting here staring at the "Note" section in google keep. The title is still empty and i don't think I'll fill it. I just felt like I should write something but idk what. I really don't. I don't know what to call this feeling but I've felt it before. It is this feeling when you have so much to do but nothing at all. When you want to do something but at the same time you know it won't make a difference or it won't matter. Or the feeling when you're around people but you still feel lonely.
I... am not me when I'm around people. I am me when you spend time with me. You get to know me when I open up to you when we're talking to each other only. Via any medium. It would be more truthful and meaningful if we're talking in person. Obviously. I am a completely different, calm and patient person when we're alone and we're talking only to each other. I'll share things with you I would never had, otherwise. I don't care if you share things or not. Or how much you share. I would just be glad that you were there sitting beside me and listening...
Me talking in a calm soothing voice, with sometimes a smile on my face, sometimes fear and sometimes the loneliness which strikes me now and then but I won't feel alone because you would be there. With me. I would just have those expressions on my face. But then I would smile and those emotions will soon fade away with a smile when I lift up my eyes and look at you. There will only be smile on my face when I look at you.
See people need a lot of things in a friend, in a partner. For me, it's just that they should just be with me when I want to talk to them and not ignore me. This just came out randomly. I thought about someone else. Wait. Let me start again. For me, it's just that they should listen to me calmly and peacefully, without judging me because I would never judge them. Never. I don't judge people. That's my thing. That's all. All I would want is that they spend time with me alone. Meaningful time when it's just us. We don't even have to talk. We would be ablr to enjoy our silence just as much as we enjoy each other's presence, and each other sharing things.
**chuckles** I don't know if I would be able to find anyone like that. I hope I do...
I... am not me when I'm around people. I am me when you spend time with me. You get to know me when I open up to you when we're talking to each other only. Via any medium. It would be more truthful and meaningful if we're talking in person. Obviously. I am a completely different, calm and patient person when we're alone and we're talking only to each other. I'll share things with you I would never had, otherwise. I don't care if you share things or not. Or how much you share. I would just be glad that you were there sitting beside me and listening...
Me talking in a calm soothing voice, with sometimes a smile on my face, sometimes fear and sometimes the loneliness which strikes me now and then but I won't feel alone because you would be there. With me. I would just have those expressions on my face. But then I would smile and those emotions will soon fade away with a smile when I lift up my eyes and look at you. There will only be smile on my face when I look at you.
See people need a lot of things in a friend, in a partner. For me, it's just that they should just be with me when I want to talk to them and not ignore me. This just came out randomly. I thought about someone else. Wait. Let me start again. For me, it's just that they should listen to me calmly and peacefully, without judging me because I would never judge them. Never. I don't judge people. That's my thing. That's all. All I would want is that they spend time with me alone. Meaningful time when it's just us. We don't even have to talk. We would be ablr to enjoy our silence just as much as we enjoy each other's presence, and each other sharing things.
**chuckles** I don't know if I would be able to find anyone like that. I hope I do...
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